The Top Ten Things To Say If An Obviously Gay Guy Says: “Girl, I’m Straight!"

Chico and Del's TOP TEN.. a way to start a good day :)

GOOD MORNING.

1. Bobidax – “Ah…at ang email mo ay gay@indenial.com?”
2. Bobidax – “Straight-in mong mukha mo!”
3. Evilpupil – “Keribells lang yan, beki!”
4. Loipogi – “Oo nga, straight ka…straight to hell!”
5. Automatic Allan/Boknoi – “Derecho? Baka derecho sa gay bar!”
6. Ken – “Straight-acting nga, hindi ka papasa…STRAIGHT pa?!?”
7. SC – “Alam ba ‘to ng boyfriend mo?”
8. Dru – “If that’s the case then maybe you should stop saying stuff like: ‘Parurusahan kita sa ngalan ng buwan!’”
9. Babyburn – “Eh bakit ka nagle-leave tuwing araw ng Miss Universe?”
10. Ken – “Talaga? May straight palang bottom?”
11. Malditamanika – “Sige nga, kung straight ka, i-kiss mo ko sa lips.”
12. Moncher – “Yeah, straight and stiff when a hunk walks by…”
13. SC – “Ang tanong: mamayang gabi kaya, straight ka pa din?”
14. Dominic of Pasig/Feb15 – “Straight? O straight guy ang hanap?”
15. TwistedSaint – “Mommy, si Daddy o!”
16. University Lad – “Bongga, best actress!”
17. TReiz – “Sige friend, susuportahan kita…”
18. Pharmacoid – “Sakalin kita ng scarf mo eh!”
19. Bernadette – “Weh?”
20. RC & Cess – “Trulalu at walang eklavu?”
21. Hopeless Jec/Khitz_joma – “You go, girl!”
22. SC – “Eh di magpakulot ka!”
23. Dru – “Pag di ka tumigil, tatawag ako sa ABS-CBN at ire-report kita sa Bantay Bakla!”

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SPOILED BRAT

The Top Signs That You’re A Spoiled Brat – Astroboy

1. Morticia – My mom would carry me whenever there’s a flood in our area…even when I was in college already.
   
2. Pretty_Kitty – While ordering, the cashier kept suggesting food I should get. I told her: “If I wanted them, then I’d order them.”
   
3. Robjo – When my friend was younger, she’d draw a circle on the ground and tell her yaya: “Diyan ka lang, wag kang lalabassa circle!” Sad part was, the yayas would do it. That’s why they had new yayas every 2 months.
   
4. Binbin – Everytime my mom would say no, I’d go to my dad and he’d say yes.
   
5. Kesibi – When I was young I used to force our maid to eat cat food. I wanted to make sure it was safe to feed our cat.
   
6. Morgan – I know a girl who drugged her boy barkada half her age to get herself pregnant.
   
7. Louise – After my husband comes home tired after working all day, I ask him to massage my back…because it’s sore after lying down all day.
   
8. Sherry25 – When my sister and I want something from our parents, we ask our brother to ask them. They always say no to us, but always say yes to him.
   
9. No name – Whenever I scold my 6-year-old son, he tells me: “Sige, isusumbong kita sa tatay mo!”
   
10. Cheezee – Whenever my friend fights with her mom, she maxes out her mom’s credit card.
    
11. Edric – My friend is a flight attendant so she bought a house and left her son with her parents. Whenever her son gets mad, he tells his own grandparents: “Get out of my house!”
    
12. Kurengkeng – When I’m irritable on a weekend, my husband would go: “Haaay…ang sarap mag-malling!” Then he’d bring me to my favorite boutique and insist I buy that blouse that I’d be eyeing even if we don’t really have a budget for it.
    
13. Gracia – I know of a mom whose daughter doesn’t go to school, just because she doesn’t want to! Ironically, this mom is a DepEd official.
    
14. Frederique – I know of a 48-year-old ex-military man who never flushes the toilet. Instead, his wife flushes after he’s done doing #1 or #2 wherever they are. We call him Flush Gordon.
    
15. Jorik – I would bang the door, wet myself and cry for hours until my parents gave me what I wanted.
    
16. Candies – If everytime you see someone laughing, you go: “Shut up, bitch.”
    
17. Tipsy – We have an officemate we stopped going out with, because she would absentmindedly hand us her mineral water, bag, or wallet, as if we were her yayas.
    
18. Dennis – My daughter asked for a mini-notebook because her brand new 13-inch laptop is “too heavy”.
    
19. No name – I’ve been married to my husband for 25 years, but I never said “I’m sorry” to my husband, not even once, even if I’m at fault.
    
20. Smiles_a_lot – I had a schoolmate who demanded her parents fly her whole class and all her friends to Boracay for her debut.
    
21. Espeks – I grew up mapili sa pagkain. Whenever I’d visit my then girlfiend’s house, my future in-laws would ask me first if I’d eat what they were planning to cook. If not, they’d cook something else.
    
22. Ais – My brother gets paid for every passing grade he got in school.
    
23. Loipogi – Spoiled brat yung biyenan ng friend ko. Every 15th and 30th, she always visits their house & expects something from the couple.
    
24. Siren – I never experience color-coding because everyone in the house adjusts to my schedule so that I’d always have a car to use.
    
25. Mama Aphaj – We all live in the North, but everytime we have a get-together, we meet up somewhere in the South because of one spoiled barkada who lives in Alabang.
    
26. Mama Aphaj – My dad is 55, I’m 37, working, married with 3 kids. But I still get an allowance from him.
    
27. Maomao – I don’t want to admit that I’m a spoiled brat, but one time my mom told me: “Anak, wala ka na bang iuutos? Matutulog na kasi ko eh.”

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RX 93.1 morning rush TOP 10

The first days of this semester were genuinely the sign of a bigger stone to be stepped on in my pursuit of a successful engineering career. I used to have morning schedules in my previous semesters that forced me to get regular sleeping time but as we eventually overcome each subjects in the curriculum, we are forced to adjust ourselves to later subject schedules.

Before, I used to wake up earlier than the sun, I used to go and ride with my father's car at the same time every morning. I could always take snippets of random people's emotions rushing in the morning. I really miss these things. Even in times when I was feeling cold and chilly but had to splash my body with water just to freshen my whole day in school. I miss it. I just miss the fresh sun.. everything :)

Now, I have adjusted my morning to 12:00 PM and everything turned into a dull bright and hot afternoon.

What I actually miss the most is the chance to listen to "RX 93.1's Chico and Delamar's Top Ten Morning Rush".. A weekday morning radio show of Monster Radio RX 93.1 and is hosted by Chico Garcia and Delamar. Its main feature is the Top Ten. The DJs would pick a topic for the day and announce it at the start of the show. DJs would choose from topics suggested by listeners or occasionally come up with their own topic. This radio show never failed to entertain me.

I was once able to get my entry to one of their topics, the time when I still had an OPERA MINI installed in my cellphone. I also had the chance to be greeted on air.. There was this time while I was with my sister and my father inside the car (on our way to school), I used my phone to ask chico and del to greet them. They were surprised to hear their names on the radio..haha. I really loved my mornings because of them.

A while ago, while surfing the net, I found myself looking for their top ten. Subsequently, I went to chico garcia's blog and found lots of top tens! yey! Below is one list that made me feel a part of my happy morning. I hope they wouldn't mind me copying their entries. hahaha sorry. :p

• March 16, 2009 → The Top Ten Signs That You’re Not A Good Boyfriend/Girlfriend – Specialist

1. No name – If she consistently call you Bryan, instead of Ryan.
2. Fuster – If he didn’t show up on your wedding day.
3. Neo M.D. – When my father died, my girlfriend was one of the last to find out. She even found out from another friend.
4. Isprikititay – After 5 years of waiting for him to propose, I finally got tired and proposed to him. I bought him a ring and asked him if he will marry me. He said: “Nakakakalalaki ka naman!” and left with a huff.
5. Humangus Pepet – My boyfriend of 2 years never pays for anything. I pay for food, drinks, transpo, and motel.
6. Awsom – Every time I get into a fight with my girlfriend, I go out with another girl. And when she calls I even let her hear that I’m with someone else.
7. Hellgirl – If he constantly competes with your family as to who you love more.
   Ginger 0 If you’re sending an entry to the Top Ten instead of us talking about it.
8. No name – If after all the hard work you put into working out to achieve your hot body, he still doesn’t get “excited”.
9. Smiles-a-lot – If you tell people you don’t enjoy your girlfriend because she has inverted nipples.
10. Sasha Purse/Maomao – If she demands that you surrender to her all your passwords in all your email and social networking accounts.
11. Gracia – He demands to see what your wearing by web cam before you go out of the house. Same when you get home, to check if you got home on time.
12. Ube Wan Kinuba – If you’ve been together for 2 years but his status on his FB is still “single”.
13. Aicko – I told all my friends that the real reason I don’t kiss my boyfriend is because his saliva is too sticky.
14. Maomao – I’m used to being an indianera. One time my boyfriend waited for 6 hours before finding out that I changed my mind and was therefore not coming.
15. Lainey – When your girlfriend asks you out, you say: “I’ll check my sked.” And that translates to: “I’ll check my other girlfriend’s sked.”
16. Jan Kulog – If you ask him where the ipod you gave him is, the one you saved up for so long justso you can buy him one, he says: “Ay, na-misplace ko.”
17. No name – I skipped my girlfriend’s debut even if I was her escort because I had early classes the next day.
18. Psylocke – If his standard line to you is: “I love you, pero hindi tayo ha?”
19. No name – When we fight I throw him out of the condo, even if he owns it.
20. Jen/Hakuna Matata – When you tell him: “I love you.” He answers: “Pasa-load muna!”
21. Max – If you only say you love her when you want sex.
22. Specialist – If you give her gifts that were given to you by your ex.
23. Jedi Mstr – If your private videos end up online or in Quiapo.
24. RC & Cess – If he won’t text you unless you give him load.
25. No name – My ex-boyfriend told all his friends that he was breaking up with me, way before he told me.
26. Maximo – Pag yung iyo lagi mong pinapasubo sa kanya, pero yung kanya ni ayaw mo man lang amuyin.

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